I am terribly sad. Our brightest and best. I heard last night from my friend and colleague who just moved to Columbia this year to work with Steve My deepest sympathies to their families and to those of you who were close to these two wonderful men

By: Dr. Joan A. Fraser, UBC Dept of Pediatrics.

I'm so deeply grateful for the opportunity to have grown personally and professionally by knowing these two wonderful people. I was honored to have them in my home in July during a visit to Rochester. I'll remember Rich (at my first COMSEP meeting in Nashville) leading us in song by the guitarist he'd found on the street, and Steve ensuring that everyone was up and on the dance floor in Florida earlier this year. Even as a junior member of COMSEP, they always made me feel that I was a colleague. What an accomplishment for them -- to have done so much and to have touched so many by just being themselves. I hope we can find a permanent and fitting way to honor their legacy.

By: Stephanie Starr, Mayo

The sense of loss is just completely overwhelming. Both Steve and Rich had such a profound impact on me- absolutely amazing, extraordinary people. So warm, so generous, so fun to be around. Such fantastic teachers and role models for all of us. I was at the APA meeting this past spring, Steve and Rich were putting on a workshop and I made a point of attending. At the start of the session, they asked the participants why they were there at the workshop and what they hoped to get out of it. It was finally my turn to speak and I said, " I just love watching these guys teach." And that was true. I'd seen their workshop before, maybe there wasn't much new I would learn in terms of content, but I knew it would be great just sitting back, watching them do their thing. And it was... as always. With love to all.

By: Stuart Slavin, St. Louis U

I am still dealing with my own personal sense of loss and grief. The only way I can describe it is to say that I am feeling empty, lonely, bewildered, and at a loss as to what to do next. I got word of this tragedy at 11:55 AM Central Standard on Wednesday. Mike Lawless called me and I have not been able to do any meaningful work since then. Every time I sit down at my desk and try to get anything done, my eyes fill with tears and my thoughts go to all of the moments I was able to share with Rich and Steve. What I remember at this moment is the compassionate, engaging, non-judgmental way they both treated me. I would meet them at COMSEP or some other meeting and I would just be energized by their positive approach, their caring attitudes towards the students that we all nurture and teach, their ability to inspire us to make a difference in our students' lives and in the lives of our professional colleagues, I will miss this so very much. I have many anecdotes, but none so terribly humorous as those I have read. I marveled at Rich's abilities to bring out the best in everyone in the room. I was impressed with Steve's ability to deal with stress and remain so calm. When at a meeting we (Rich, Steve Larrie Greenberg and I) would go to a restaurant and just laugh until our sides were ready to split. Most of this was driven by Rich and Steve's perpetual banter and their always chastening me about being too serious - "You gotta lighten up, Freddie" would be Rich's admonition. Steve would just smile and I could just imagine what he was thinking - "Yeah, don't take yourself so seriously." These two could go on for hours in conversation and never go back to a previous point ever! I miss them now, I'll miss them for a long time to come. What saddens me now the most, is that I will never have to opportunity to tell each of these incredibly talented men how much of an impact they have had on my life and how much they have influenced me in my daily interactions with students of every shape and form. To Rich and Steve - I'm not good at songs and I am seldom good at quoting things exactly, but I am reminded of a song from the 60's based upon scripture that there is a season for everything and a purpose under heaven. It is not mine to fathom the reasons, but rather to move ahead with the fond memories that I have of you both. I will try my best to carry your message to those I am destined to encounter. I will do that to the best of my ability, but I'll never be as good you - never! I miss you both and I'll do the best I can to carry on your work.

By: Fred A. McCurdy, Amarillo

I need to thank all of you for easing my burden. I get to read these, laugh, cry and reflect before I send them. The fact that I get them first is a silly reward that somehow makes me feel better. It's like I get a private moment before I share, and I feel a need to be selfish at the moment. You all have done so much better a job than I could have expressing yourselves, and I truly marvel at you ways with words. One common theme is the remarkable ability Richard and Steve had at making us think each of us was their close friend. What an amazing skill! I am amazed at how they were so capable of being "in the moment" no matter who they were with. Part of me thinks that I have no right to have considered myself their friend, yet I really believe I was. And I really believe all of you who were touched by them were their friends as well. Someone who commands English well should try to capture this essence for their families to know - they befriended us all at a level that few ever do. Please keep the postings up, I need the therapy.

By: Bruce

In Memorium - Steven Z. Miller and Richard T. Sarkin
I am deeply saddened to announce that two dedicated and outstanding pediatric educators were killed in a plane crash in Kirksville, Missouri on October 19, 2004 en route to Kirksville College of Osteopathic Medicine where they were scheduled to present a workshop on Humanism in Medicine for the Arnold Gold Foundation. Steven Z. Miller was the President of the Council for Medical Student Education in Pediatrics (COMSEP) and Medical Student Clerkship Director at Columbia University in New York City. Richard T. Sarkin was Past President of COMSEP and Director of Medical Student Education at the State University of New York at Buffalo. Steve and Rich were close colleagues and friends of many of us in APPD and shared a common passion for improving medical education and promoting the professional and personal development of pediatric educators. They were truly inspirational pediatric educators and role models for pediatric academic faculty. Please seek out and support your colleagues who are involved in the pediatric clerkship in your institution during this time of mourning. We will be posting contact information for their families later. For those of you who wish to pay tribute to Steve and Rich, we will set up a Memorial Tribute Board to post a posthumous tribute to them. These will be collated and sent to their loved ones. Sincerely.

By: Theodore C. Sectish, MD President, Association of Pediatric Program Directors

I too have been reflecting since learning of this tragedy, thinking about what an impression and impact both of these individuals had on my life and the lives of thousands of faculty, students, children and families they touched. I feel fortunate to have known and worked with both of them. Watching both of them take COMSEP and pediatric medical education to new heights energized all of us. They made us/me smile, laugh, think, reflect, laugh again, and celebrate the joy of teaching, learning, and humanism in what we do as physicians and as members of society. If there is one light in this dark tunnel, it is that Rich and Steve's legacy will be with so many of us and the subsequent generations of students and families they touched, and for that I, as I'm sure is true for everyone who knew them, am most grateful. I will miss them terribly.

By: Lewis First, UVM

Steven Z. Miller
My counterpart at COMSEP is someone who I was just getting to know. For years I have seen his face every time we did our clerkship orientation as he figures prominently in the COMSEP video about the pediatric history and physical examination. Earlier this week, I saw Steve again when our latest group of students began the clerkship and watched the COMSEP video. I smiled then like I do every time I watch the video as he allays the fears of our students and as he reminds them that pediatrics is a field of medicine where you are allowed to have fun. His own personality came through so strikingly in the video and in real life as a person dedicated to people, to education, and to children. He provided a wonderful and fun-loving perspective to the community at COMSEP and I feel lucky to have known him but for too short a time.

Richard T. Sarkin
Rich was inspirational as I watched him lead the COMSEP meeting some years ago. He blended a commanding leadership style with a warm, introspective, and comfortable manner that promoted in me self-reflection and an examination of personal and professional values. It was clear to me that Rich was committed to his values, to balance in his life, and to teaching students. I also remember the feeling I had whenever I had a conversation with Rich. He conveyed an intense and genuine interest in what we discussed - he was clearly "in the moment," not just having bland conversation. I was privileged to participate in a workshop in which he demonstrated his enormous energy, quick wit, and infectious enthusiasm. If I could offer a prescription for what ails our current teaching environment at times it would be to replace the lack of the excitement and focus with a dose of Richard Sarkin. Now it is up to the rest of us to try to emulate his fine example and remember him in our moments of teaching.

By: Ted Sectish

From someone who you all have figured out by now- is not often accused of being reticent... my ability to communicate about this to each of you via Email came to a full stop.... while personally I've been experiencing what is surely much the same as you. There are no written words to remotely capture the grief that so many many many individuals far beyond the families, the local friends, department colleagues are feeling. How amazing that my own personal hundreds, literally hundreds of memories, stories, conversations, communications with both Rich and Steve are quite dramatically replicated so many times over by so many others - different memories, different stories- some shared, others not- and yet, the echoes from each sound bite flooding back to each of us all reverberate with the same melodies - incredible personal connections because these two friends cared so much about really listening to what each of us was saying- filled with such laughter and so much fun! so much joy in sharing common goals, important but sometimes difficult tasks- and feeling so valued and appreciated by each of them- to say nothing of all those evenings when the work was done for the day- wine, great food, so many different cities so many different tables- but never dull, always worth staying up no matter how late it was- because they were there. And- the incredible incredible part of this- as that each one of you, scattered all over the continent, knows exactly what I'm talking about- because they made it happen for each of us, over and over again. A million hugs to each of you. I've promised myself never to forget the hugs.

By: Paula Algranati, UConn

To COMSEP members:
My silence is only because of my deepest grief in losing two wonderful friends with whom I was so close professionally abd personally. Rich and I were supposed to do a workshop on bedside teaching at AAMC Nov 7. That workshop will go on in his memory, hard as it will be. What I wanted to convey to you all is how nurturing this organization in, in times of happiness and times like these. For those of us who have a long history with Rich and Steve, the network of callers and emailers to me and others was absolutely amazing. People called or emailed just to 'talk' and have someone listen. Steve and Rich's legacy as consummate educators, visionary leaders, wonderful human beings, strong husbands and fathers, and touchable people will live on forever. For most of us, this loss will remain for a long time. The challenge is to take from Steve and Rich and use that to make us even better. May their wonderful memories ease our sorrow and that of their families as we try to move forward in our work as medical student advocates. Fondly, Larrie Greenberg I am just stunned and heartbroken. I would have never imagined that our conference call last week would be the last time I would speak to Steve. What makes it even more surreal for me is that it is close to the 2nd anniversary of the death of my sister in law, Mary McEvoy, who died in the tragic plane crash that also killed Senator Paul Wellstone and his wife. What are the odds of having a loved one and two good friends perish in separate plane crashes?

By: Joe Gigante

I thought I would wait to write to try and be coherent and not ramble on, no luck. We all have our memories of when we met these 2 wonderful men. I have been coming to the meetings since the first one in Pittsburgh. Over the years, Rich was always in the thick of it, full of ideas, excitement, engaging everyone he met. Steve looked like a little kid in a candy store, later at his first meeting, with that twinkle in his eye, and enormous ball of energy deciding what do I want to do first. All of it, of course! What a special relationship this group has for us both personally and professionally. When Bill Wilson called, it was such a blow, but I was so glad to hear it from family. I missed the meeting in Tenn. to take call that week. What a disappointment. I did manage to make it to the SIG meeting, where as always was warmly greeted by Steve, Rich and many of our other buddies. Hugs and kisses all around. I brought our program director with me and he was stunned to see how we were all genuinely glad to be together. These were no ordinary people. In Cincinnati, Joe Gigante and I got to be Rich's "well-rehearsed" role playing partners during one of his sessions. Last fall we had the honor of hosting these 2 in Morgantown. Many of the faculty and staff here were sad to hear of the loss. It was a brief visit, but as usual touched many. I have [tried to, but did not succeed in - it will be on the web site when that is up: BZM] attached one of my favorite photos from that visit. Rich had researched the WV area before coming and wanted to see Frank Lloyd Wright's "Falling Water" in nearby PA. The man to my right is Marty Weisse (program director),then me, Rich and Steve. They got a big chuckle when we said it look liked the 2 little Italians on the left were the hobbits standing next to Gandalf and the Elf King out there in the woods. My thoughts, prayers and condolences go to their families and my COMSEP family. We are all better people for having them in our lives. Hugs to all.

By: Renee Moore, West Virginia

I returned from a medical conference today and learned of our loss. I did not know Steve but I send my condolences to all of you who did, and to his family. I met Rich 15 years ago at my first COMSEP meeting and was immediately drawn to his enthusiasm, his energy, his devotion to medical students and teaching, his loudness, his unsubtle, sarcastic wit, his belief in others, and, to him. We have kept in touch over the years as he became a model of a medical educator and toook his show on the road to the benefit of hundreds, perhaps thousands. He was a wonderful man and a man full of wonder. May God give us strength as we mourn Rich's death, and rejoice in his life.

By: Andrew Wilking, M.D. Houston, Tx.

For me, Rich was someone who always made sure that I was included...from the very my very first COMSEP meeting...He always gave a hug, checked to see how I was doing and REALLY listened to what I said. He was someone who always made me feel like I could achieve what I wanted to achieve. I remember the conspiratorial whispering during PAS workshops...asking me what I thought and then giving me his views (then I would try not to laugh). The amazing thing was that he did this with EVERYBODY! Talking, laughing, including, supporting and asking how things were going. He was constantly reminding us all how fortunate we were to work with students, know each other and be a part of something bigger. The consummate show man, leader, mentor and friend.

By: Sherilyn Smith, Seattle

I just sent these reflections about Steve to the APA list, but want to send it to COMSEP, too. I am so grateful for the support we have offered one another in COMSEP, through these postings and also email and phone calls within the research and scholarship task force (and knowing how grand an organization COMSEP is, I'm sure the other task forces are doing the same.) I knew Steve more closely than Rich. I keep remembering him in the hallway at the last COMSEP meeting, asking if I would be interested in coming to Columbia to lead some focus groups of parents to gather descriptions of professionalism from the viewpoint of parents. We had recently begun an email exchange to figure out how to make this happen. Steve's genuine openness and accessibility was striking. I know many people that he had invited to share ideas or extend work through COMSEP and the APA, and the collective work of these organizations was incredibly furthered through his efforts. I also remember participating with Steve in a working group on key pediatric content for family medicine curricula. We were talking about the next meeting of the group, in conjunction with another conference. I remember that he talked about scheduling the meeting in time for him to catch a plane home the last day of the conference, because it was important to him to get home to his children. He was a great example of a person who found ways to balance the most important priorities in life.

By: Jan Hanson, Uniformed Services University of the Health Sciences

Due to a confluence of sad news, I really needed some reasons to smile today. Leslie sent me this to post, and then I heard the material that I refer to later. Perhaps it will make you all feel a little better. It helped me. Thank you all for helping me and us through. This conversation (that we can do it and that it is so heartfelt) is another of Rich and Steve's legacies.

By: Bruce

My reflections -- finally Thinking back over my friendships with Rich and Steve, I realize that I have known them for quite a while, and yet it was painfully short. We had so much left to do together. I met Rich over 10 years ago when he and Larry Greenberg came to UCIrvine at the invitation of Jennifer Johnson. I was a chief resident at the time, and Rich made me feel like I had the most important job in the world. He told me that I must stay in education, and must come to this new meeting of student educators, COMSEP. He told me he would look for me at the meeting, and he did. I have been coming to COMSEP ever since. Rich attended or "dropped by" every workshop I have ever given. I *knew* he would be there every time, and he was. Every time he made me feel that what I was doing was important, and that my contributions mattered. I valued our conversations about how listening skills are acquired skills, and how one has to work, hard, to make it a habit when it does not come naturally. He exemplified that habit with everyone he came in contact with. My favorite memory of Rich was driving him around New England on an absolutely beautiful spring day a few years ago. He kept saying to me, with that intense look on his face: "You DO know that this is just beautiful, don't you? You DO realize how lucky you are, don't you? You DO appreciate this, don't you?" Yes, Rich, I do, I really do. But the colors are a little more dull today. I promise I will continue to learn to listen. How can I describe Steve with words? He was just way too much. I just laugh every time I think of him. I loved him, and I wanted to throttle him, all at the same time! He was like a kid at times -- everything was interesting, everything looked like a new toy on Christmas, everyone's idea was a good on, he wanted to do it all. He couldn't say no to anyone or anything. He was the most inclusive person I have ever known. I kidded him that I am a classic "Type A" personality, and that he could only be described as a Type Z (using his middle initial seemed so appropriate!). He laughed and told me that I had 24 letters left until I had it right! He taught me that just because your work was serious, that you didn't have to take life so seriously. Other than his dance floor antic in Panama City, my favorite memory of Steve was an "intimate" dinner for two. On a CLIPP trip up here to Hanover, NH (a very small town), I took Steve to dinner at a local, rather dimly lit, Italian restaurant. Typical COMSEP friends, we talked, we laughed, we joked, we shared our lives (and at least one bottle of wine, but don't tell HRSA). Near the end of the meal, I noticed one of my colleages in my department, out to dinner with his wife, STARING at us. I blanched and mentioned it to Steve, who got that twinkle in his eye, reached across the table, and took my hand! Yes, Steve, I promise I will keep having fun while working seriously, but it won't be as easy without having your zany lead to follow. Words cannot describe how empty I feel at the loss of these two great men, great husbands, great fathers, great physicians, great educators and dear friends. I find solace in the legacy that they leave us, and remain mindful of the challenge we all have to fill their shoes.

By: Leslie Fall Dartmouth

Driving to work today, I was listening to Scott Simon on NPR's Weekend Edition Saturday. He does a small story every week right after he reviews the week's news with Daniel Schorr. Today the topic was "Three Stories of Heroism." The link to the story is: http://www.npr.org/rundowns/segment.php?wfId=4123781 It gave me 3 reasons to smile: 1) the story itself is great. 2) I listened and easily imagined Steve exhorting all of us to perform these small acts of heroism. Challenging all of us to step it up, but smiling at the rather unusual nature of the 3rd example. Then he'd try to figure out what prompted the good-deed-doers to act. 3) At the same time, I could see Rich listening, smiling and nodding his head through the first 2 stories. Then, with the 3rd story, his eyes would pop out a bit, he'd be quiet for a few seconds, without breaking a smile. I can hear that next sentence: "Well, [3 second pause], there it is!"

By: Bruce

For the last several days I have been at a total loss as to how to express the shock of this great loss to our family. Rich and Steve always talked about our COMSEP family, and this tragedy drives home just how important these two remarkable individuals and the entire COMSEP family have been to me. We have lost brothers. Rich and Steve both truly thought of everyone as family, for as with family they accepted everyone and worked to include and bring out the best in us all. Their devotion to bringing Humanism and balance to medicine, medical education, and to ourselves has change how we all have approached students and our careers. There is nothing that can ease the pain of Rich and Steve's wives and children, but to know how much we appreciate them sharing their husband and father with us. The mourning process will be long, but in having known Rich and Steve I and all of us have been enriched.

By: Roger Berkow, Alabama

Rich and Steve were like brothers to me. And I, as all of you who have expressed yourselves so eloquently, feel a great sense of loss and grief. I also feel honored to have known and worked with such good people. I first met Rich at the initial COMSEP meeting, and was instantly impressed by his energy, his "stage presence", his creativity, and his overwhelming generosity of thought. He had the ability to make everyone feel important, whether in a large auditorium, a workshop or small group, or in a conversation (because, to him, everyone was important). He was a "showman" without equal, and set a high standard for keeping audiences engaged and entertained while secretly teaching them at the same time. I met Steve a few years later when he joined COMSEP, and was impressed by his enthusiasm, problem-solving skills, and his willingness to take on new challenges and to encourage his colleagues to become involved. It is no surprise that he and Rich worked so well and so closely together. Steve was always in good spirits, and never saw a problem that he thought was insoluble. His own willingness to take on new responsibilities made it difficult for the rest of us to ever say "no". For us to carry on the important work of COMSEP and other organizations dedicated to the improvement of medical education is a way to continue to honor those for whom we grieve and who have been such influences on our professional and personal lives.

By: Bill Wilson, Virginia

Dear friends.
For the past five days, I've been pretty much glued to the computer, dividing my time between reading what all of you have written and writing down my own memories. I think that Bruce hit it exactly right- both of them made so many of us feel as if we were their special friends. They also made each of us feel as if our own contributions were so valuable. For me as well as many others, Rich was personally responsible for making sure that I was instantly part of the gang upon arriving at my very first COMSEP meeting- introducing me to everyone and telling them what was special about me. And, he never failed to do the same whenever the opportunity arose, no matter where we were. And Steve eagerly continued that tradition, always making sure to include me, listen to me and support me. What follows is a special memory I'd like to share with you about each of them. On a Saturday afternoon last October, our daughter Emily called in tears from the rugby field at SUNY Buffalo. She had been playing in her first division A rugby game for Cornell. She'd been tackled illegally and immediately knew that her leg had been broken. Without a moment's hesitation, I told her to stay put and frantically dialed information praying that my only friend in Buffalo could be reached. Luck was on my side: "yes, a Richard Sarkin'ús home telephone number was listed", "yes" the voice on the other end immediately said, "yes Paula, this is the Rich Sarkin who is your friend." Needless to say, Rich sprang into action and directed Em's team mates to the ER where he knew she'd be most efficiently and appropriately treated. But this is the point in the story which truly illustrates what kind of a person Rich was. Rich called me back to tell me what was happening and then said, "I'd like to meet her at the ER, but I want you to call Emily first and ask her if it's OK if I go there. You know these college students, they're so independent. I don't want to add any more distress to what she's already experiencing." Needless to say, Emily wanted a "parent" to be with her and Rich jumped at the chance while simultaneously making sure that we were kept abreast of what was transpiring. She was stabilized with a splint, transported safely back to Ithaca and subsequently casted and rehabbed. Rich' calls and E-mails inquiring about Em's progress continued throughout the many subsequent months until he was assured that she'd fully recovered. As incredible as it sounds, two weeks ago, I received yet another "I broke my..." phone call (this time less scary, a wrist). This call was a lot less stressful as she was clearly going to be fine, having already been evaluated and splinted. In passing, I laughingly said to her, "Where's Rich when we need him?" Little did I realize at the time, how much more this question would soon come to signify. During the past few years, it seemed as if every place I traveled for a professional event, Steve would be there too. It was clearly no coincidence that I'd usually end up sitting next to him regardless of circumstance or city and even less coincidental when there was food and wine involved. This awesome teacher and leader, Steve also knew how important it was to kick back and relax and at the same time, make sure that everyone in the group shared in the fun. One couldn't help but want to be near him. His incredible listening skills didn't stop at the classroom door. During one particularly memorable (and raucous) dinner, the individuals around the table entertained the group with a series of revealing and funny stories about our spouse' quirks, long-forgotten romantic bloopers etc. I vividly remember Steve's quick-witted commentaries and feigned amazement at each of our confessions and, his personal contribution as well. One of my stories involved my husband's quirk about the way in which I part my hair ("middle part looks good, side part looks bad") which, is diametrically opposed to my own preference in this regard (not remotely important to anyone else). That night was just like all other ones: Steve was paying attention. Many months later, I arrived at a meeting and encountered Steve. He took one look at me and immediately commented, "Oh, I see that you didn't bring Barry along." When I asked him how he knew he replied, "Your hair is parted on the side." At every subsequent meeting, Steve never forgot to include a similar observation when we greeted each other. The other part of his opening greeting the rest of you have all experienced. Hugs to all of you today.

By: Paula Algranati, UConn

Words are hard to come by in times like this. Rich and Steve were exceptional - excellent teachers, mentors, leaders and, most of all, great people. Their contribution was considerable and their loss is overwhelming. I can remember Rich giving me solid advice when I was a fledgling clerkship coordinator, wisdom that I have carried with me since. Rich and Steve will be greatly missed; their memory will live on in their families, colleagues and students.

By: Michael Rieder, Children's Hospital of Western Ontario London, Ontario, Canada

I've spent the last few days with fleeting emotions of shock, grief and being flooded with thoughts of Rich's and Steve's families. I can't help but think that, if they had such incredible impact on colleagues, what types of husbands and fathers they must have been. My prayers go out to their wives and children. About 5 years ago, I took over the Basic Clerkship and my predecessor, and good friend, told me, "When you go to COMSEP, make sure you meet Steve Miller and Rich Sarkin." I did .....and my thoughts about these two echo all of yours. They were simply the best we had. When I think of the kind of educator I would like to be, I immediately think of them. I will never forget Nashville and Rich leading us in Folsom Prison Blues and I will never forget Steve's inaugural stage show last year in Panama City. Every time I watch the COMSEP exam video with my students, I have been proud to know Steve. I can essentially hear Rich's voice quoting in his lecture on balance and life philosophy. What role models of positivity, what passion for life. No wonder why scores of students at their institutions were so influenced by them. They changed, and will continue to change the way I do things and go about my work. What a terrible loss. I maybe interacted with them in person 10 times and I feel like we all do,...that we lost family.

By: Mike Barone, Johns Hopkins

This is the third time I have sat to write. I keep seeing their faces , remembering Manatees, museums (the gift shop section), late night COMSEP glasses of wine, early AM jogs, and future plans that will never be...........I am very sad, My sincere sadness reaches out to Steve and Rich's Families

By: Kim Blake

Bruce, I am truly saddened to learn of the deaths of Rich and Steve. I cannot understand why God would take these two fine young men and not give them time to complete their life works. Perhaps it is to remind us that there is so much to be done yet and we must continue to struggle to climb the mountain. I sincerely hope that Rich and Steve are at the top and somehow will help us to reach the top as well. My deepest sympathy I extend to their families with my earnest wish that the path that they must now walk will be with the help of those who love them and that their memories of Rich and Steve will not dim.

By: Roger Shott

I, too, did not know Steve and Rich for very long, but felt their presence at the various meetings I have attended. Their passion and dedication have helped to mold how I will develop my career in medical education. I think the best thing we can do is keep up the fight and passion to improve and refine our chosen path. I'm sure they'll nudge us in the right direction when we need it! Deepest condolences and sympathies to those closest to Steve and Rich.

By: Paola Palma Sisto, Medical College of Wisconsin

As someone who met both of these men recently & came to realize the greatness of their stature in medical education as well as their great personal attributes I extend my condolences to their families & to the COMSEP family who was closest to them. It is a great loss & fills even those of us in the periphery with great sadness. In time we must celebrate the lives of these men & the legacy they have left behind. I am sharing this news with other educators at my institution who may not have been aware of it yet. All the best

By: Marcellina Mian, Paediatrician, SCAN Program Director Undergraduate Medical Education Hospital for Sick Children

As I was reflecting on the profound impact that these two people had on me personally and professionally, I found this wonderful picture on the Arnold P. Gold Foundation Web Page, where they are listed as the "Traveling Fellows" (probably the reason they were traveling to Kirksville . . .) It really captures the essence of them both, and their sense of humor/humanity. Here's the link: http://humanism-in-medicine.org/cgi-bin/htmlos.cgi/06708.5.5986390990214487505?

By: Chris White

Last evening, I spoke with Jennifer Johnson, who joins us in our grief, of course. She sent this article to me this morning, as well as one about Steve. I will try to forward that as well.

By: Janet E. Fischel, Ph.D.

"I wanted to share this story from The Buffalo News with you. http://www.buffalonews.com/editorial/20041021/1027248.asp The story on Steve: NEW YORK - A pediatrician who was one of Columbia University's most beloved medical school professors was among the 13 people killed in a plane crash in Missouri. Dr. Steve Z. Miller, the director of pediatric emergency medicine at Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons, was on the commuter plane when it went down Tuesday night, the school confirmed Wednesday. The twin-engine turboprop crashed a few miles from the Kirksville, Mo., airport where it was preparing to land. It was carrying 13 passengers and two crew members from St. Louis. There were two survivors, Dr. John Krogh, 68, of Wallsburg, Utah, and a 44-year-old woman, who escaped with broken bones and burns, the National Transportation Safety Board said. The passengers were heading to a medical conference for the Arnold P. Gold Foundation, which promotes the tradition of the compassionate and caring doctor - a cause to which students say Miller was extremely dedicated. According to an article in the Journal of the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Columbia University, Miller believed a good bedside manner could be learned, contrary to those who are convinced a doctor either has it or doesn't. "It's not a simple matter. It takes hard work," Miller was quoted as saying. "You've got to respect where the patient is coming from." Students and staff at the medical school were shocked and some were in tears on Wednesday after learning of the crash of Miller's plane. "A lot of people in our class are very close to him. He's one of the younger and more outgoing attendings - he has a lot of interaction with the students here because he's very loved," said Josiah Ambrose, a fourth-year medical student. "He was a pretty pivotal part of our medical school." Ambrose said most students got to know Miller while in their third-year pediatrics rotations, which he oversaw. Miller was considered one of the most outstanding teachers at the medical school, according to the journal article, and was nominated repeatedly as teacher of the year. He was known for his ability to break down a complex task into simple steps. He also paid special attention to students and how they were handling the difficulties of medical school - a rarity in that fast-paced world, students said. "He was just a really very genuine, very dedicated and very warm person," said Maryalice Naley, a neurology resident. "He sort of made it OK to be a super-achieving doctor and a family guy at the same time." Naley, who knew Miller for seven years, remembered seeing him heading home on the subway after a long day at work, still "giddy with excitement" to spend time with his young children. Miller, a graduate of Columbia, completed a residency at Albert Einstein School of Medicine before returning to become the director of pediatric emergency medicine, according to the journal article."

What a loss.. certainly from me personally. Having been and still am one of the "geezers" in the group, I have had a chance to work with Rich and Steve for many years. I even was the opposition candidate to Rich for president and told my wife then, that I was so glad he won (She was very happy as well). He did such a wonderful job as President. Rich and Steve have followed in the footsteps of great inspirational leaders such as O.J. Sahler, Larrie Greenberg, Ardis Olson Fred McCurdy, Mike Lawless and others who have been passionate about COMSEP and helped forge a strong identity and legitimacy for the value of medical education. I know that all of us have personal memories of Rich and Steve. It helps me to try to remember wonderful moments of their lives and their impact on us. so here are just a few for me: I remember how Rich used video tape in his teaching to help us think out of the box : "Cool Hand Luke" with Paul Newman as teacher centered learning or the Wizard of Oz as student or adult center learning. I remember passing in the hallway when Rich was meeting with the brand new clerkship directors, and spoke to them about how COMSEP was their home, was a fun organization and we are all here to welcome them: What a nurturing and supportive culture he forged How could we ever for get Steve's twinkle in his eyes and smile.. I will see it each 6 weeks as I show the videotape he is in, for the Approach to the Physical Exam and History of the child. I will always remember many group HUGS with Steve leading Kumbayah. (? Sp) I will miss both of them so much I now that all of us grieve and think about their wives and children. Hopefully Robin and Bruce will let us know how, at some later point, we may wish to communicate our love and condolences to their families.

By: Ben Siegel

Please accept the fact that I batch these to post. It's easier for the software to get the messages out and it seems more poignant to have several comments per posting --- Bruce It has been a pleasure to have known and worked with Steve and Rich. Later today I am holding our monthly workshop on altruism for our third year students. This workshop comes directly form the work of Steve, who came here to teach me the skills I needed. I cannot stop thanking Steve for his help in teaching me to be a better teacher. The world has lost two truly wonderful people. My prayers to their families.

By: Rainer Gedeit, Milwaukee, WI

This has become a deeply sad week. Steve's and Rich's strength of character, drive to improve medical education, and dynamic and caring personalities permeated COMSEP, whether members knew them well personally or not. My thoughts are with their families and all of their many beloved friends at this time of tremendous, overwhelming loss.

By: Amy Middleman, Baylor College of Medicine

It remains so very hard to put into words our sad feelings about this tragic loss, and to register that Rich and Steve are gone. First and most importantly, deepest and heartfelt condolences to their families. These two men's lives touched so creatively and wonderfully a number of educational circles, including our COMSEP family. Their teaching and their leadership -- how they wove fabulous teaching points into workshops, humor, insight, expectations of quality, perspectives on the big picture and attention to the smallest details. Among their messages? Quality teaching matters; teaching and transmitting professionalism, humanism matter, gather inspiration from science, of course, but also from art, and from people, and simply show how much you love what you do --- all of that feeds your development as a teacher, and your skills in faculty development. Among the several challenges for us in COMSEP, might be to keep their memory alive with those messages at particularly trying moments -- consider what Rich might do at a critical teaching moment and see if it informs what you or I decide to do. Embrace our work with the enthusiasm they exemplified. I am so thankful they were with us, even if only for way too brief a time.

By: Janet Fischel, SUNY Stony Brook

Rich and Steve so enriched our personal lives as well as one' life as an educator. Rich taught me that adults can keep changing and improving. I remember well his first 7 steps talks. They evolution of their interests into the wonderful Humanism workshops were such a great example. They also were so important is reminding us that you can have fun while getting your message out effectively. As we grieve and struggle to recover our balance with this news lets think how there approach could be supported in an ongoing way within COMSEP to honor them. My thoughts with all of you.

By: Ardis Olson, Dartmouth

I still don't know quite how to express these feelings. There's intense gratitude for the work of Rich and Steve, intense sorrow at the loss of them to colleagues, medical students and their friends and families, and an empty feeling when I think ahead to future COMSEP meetings and work we had planned to do together.

By: Janice L. Hanson, Ph.D. Uniformed Services University of the Health Sciences

Maybe it's a little easier to find the words today.... I have been out of town the past few days so you can imagine my shock and horror as I started catching up with emails this morning. However, I also have the advantage of seeing the responses from so many COMSEP members. We have lost two of our COMSEP family members, and it hurts. Rich and Steve have been inspirations to me, and truly meet the title of mentors, a term I do not use freely. What hurts me most is that I never told them how much they have helped me, so let me say it now to them and all COMSEP members - thank you for your guidance, your support, your friendship. I enjoy being a clerkship director, because of all of you. I will be orienting a new group of students to the pediatric clerkship this afternoon, an activity that includes showing the "Introduction to the Pediatric Physical Exam" which now takes on even more significance.

By: Bob Drucker, Duke

I am a relative "newbie" to COMSEP. I started attending COMSEP meetings several years ago. We recently revised the entire content of our pediatric clerkship. I must say that many features of the clerkship were highly influenced by what I have learned from members in COMSEP, especially from Rich and Steve. Both of them possessed a genuine passion and compassion for the children all of us our trying to protect and heal. They will continue to inspire me and I will miss them. With sorrow.

By: Pradip D. Patel, Louisville

I am absolutely stunned at this tragic news. COMSEP has lost two shining stars, but we can all be comforted by the fact that we are much better for knowing these wonderful people. The memory of that spontaneous dance-a-thon in Panama City will always be with me. My sincere condolences to their families.

By: Maxine, Kingston, Ontario

I cried at my computer yesterday when I learned about Rich and Steve, and am doing so again as I write this note. They obviously touched a lot of our lives in very special ways. I had recently talked with Steve, and am so glad I had the chance to do so. Although those of us who have been around COMSEP for a while already knew this, it is all the more obvious in this difficult time that our bond goes far deeper than just being a group of educators. My prayers are with each of you who were especially close to Steve and Rich (although I think truthfully we all were) and for their families. I don't think I can be at the AAMC meeting on November 7, but those who can please include me in the hugs. God bless you all.

By: Mitch Harris, Indiana

As I read the tributes to Rich and Steve posted on the COMSEP website, I find that either I have developed cataracts in the past few days, my glasses no longer can be cleaned, or my vision is compromised by the wetness in my eyes. The first is surgically correctable; the second requires only replacement. Sadly, the third is not amenable to correction or replacement. Rich and I were planning a presentation to be delivered jointly in a few weeks; we agreed to the invitation because we looked forward to the fun of working together. There are colleagues I admire and colleagues I respect-- but Rich and Steve have been colleagues to cherish and treasure. We shared that our love for teaching comes from a love of learning and a love of those from whom we learn-- and the joy of making people smile and laugh. Can anyone think of Steve and not smile or laugh out loud? The only clue you got was the twinkle in his eye, the tip off that something was coming-- something that would make you laugh and also make a point. And Rich-- over the top! Knowing what these two have meant to all of us, I cannot imagine the grief of Marcia and Dodi and their families. I just can't....

By: Ken Roberts

Like every morning, I opened my email to look for news from from all my colleagues and friends. It has been so sad to hear this morning of the loss of Steve Miller and Richard Sarkin. For me, being so far south, I had not the opportunity of knowing them so closely, but from the COMSEP meetings and the list serve commentaries I did appreciated very much their involvement, caring attitude and commitment for all that belong to improve students learning and advancement in teaching methodologies. Please give my condolences to their respective families and to all COMSEP members as well. I know in GOD that their are in Glory. From PR we will be praying for them and specially for their families. Once again my deep condolences to all.

By: Nydia Bonet, MD UPR School of Medicine Dept. of Pediatrics nbonet@rcm.upr.edu

What a loss for us, for our residents and students and for children everywhere. My heart goes out to their families and their colleagues.

By: Meg Fisher, MD

Thank you for informing us of this horrible tragedy. The world of Pediatric Education has suffered a great loss. I feel sick and saddened. I truly feel like I lost a family member and I am at a loss for words. Nothing that we say at this time will bring back these 2 remarkable individuals that did so much for others. Perhaps, once this sinks in and the initial shock eases, I'll have something rational to say--right now I don't.

By: Gary Freed

I am in total shock and having a tough time focusing...Rich Sarkin is mostly responsible for my involvement in COMSEP. I remember being a rookie at Clerkship Director and feeling lost...not only did Rich take me under his wing at meetings, he made sure that I was involved and encouraged me to explore leadership opportunities. Steve has always been a role model for me. How he did everything that he did for Columbia, COMSEP, medical education in general, yet still have balance in his life. He was amazing. And their combined project on Humanism in Medicine is ground-breaking in developing and refining methods to teach and evaluate this important topic. I will miss them both deeply.

By: David Levine, Atlanta

As some others have noted about themselves in their postings, I generally keep things inside and have trouble putting my feelings down on paper (real or virtual). But here's my attempt. I found out about Rich and Steve that night when Cindy Christy called me at home with the news. What a jolt to my routine daily complacency to come to terms with the loss of 2 people who I have interacted with at meetings, whom I was inspired by, and whose jokes and antics I frequently laughed (or rolled my eyes) at . My thoughts turned to their families, loved ones, friends and I grieve with them in their (and our) loss. The personal nature of this loss I hope will rekindle in me that little part of my humanity that often tends to be overwhelmed and swamped by work deadlines and petty annoyances through the knowledge that all the deaths everywhere that I read about in the paper or hear about on the radio are personal losses for someone. From Rich and Steve I have caught a chronic case of their infectious enthusiasm for teaching and their can-do, always positive attitude, for which I hope I am never cured.

By: Bill Varade, University of Rochester

Thank you Bruce, for providing a wonderful example of just how both Steve and Rich made us all smile. It's how I do and will remember both of them. I am still enormously saddened by the untimely death of these two wonderful human beings. It is impossible to think of the upcoming AAMC meeting without them there. Steve, the person who made each of us feel valued personally by him. He never failed to seek us out, ask about our lives, the little things we talked about at prior meetings, how our spouse (by name) was doing. I remember being awed by watching him with others. It always seemed so personal, as if there was nothing else on his mind, no one else in the world at that moment. And his passion - for education, for doing the right thing, for learning more, for making us all go at least one step between our usual comfort level - even if it was just participating in a group hug. With Rich, there was the same intensity. I can still feel his gaze - so focused on you when you were talking with him. His easy laugh, his quick wit, and his love for stepping outside the box - presenting something from a different point of view that always seemed to add new depth to our understanding. What forces they both were! What great role models they clearly have been! What wonderful friends to have, even if it was far shorter than all of us would have dreamed of. There are parts of both of these extraordinary men that will remain with each of us and make us all better - as educators and as human beings. As we all face our own challenges, there will be moments when one or both of them will be with us in spirit - egging us on, supporting us to be the best we can be. Thanks, Rich and Steve. It's time for that group hug now.

By: Karen Wendelberger-Marcdante, Milwaukee

[This was on the AAMC weekly email newsletter, AAMC STAT today:]
Medical school professors killed in Missouri plane crash Several medical educators and university faculty members were among the 13 people killed last Tuesday when an airplane crashed just outside of an airport in Missouri. The passengers were en route to an Arnold P. Gold Foundation conference on humanism in medicine. Among the deceased are Steve Z. Miller, M.D., director of pediatric medical education at Columbia University College of Physicians and Surgeons, and Richard T. Sarkin, M.D., professor of clinical pediatrics at the University at Buffalo State University of New York School of Medicine and Biomedical Sciences. Drs. Miller and Sarkin have made significant contributions to the field of medical education. Both were scheduled to speak at the AAMC's upcoming Annual Meeting in Boston next month.
Information: Go to http://cpmcnet.columbia.edu and http://www.smbs.buffalo.edu

" Paula Algranati pointed me to the following link, which is streaming video of some of Richard's sessions on teaching: http://devo.buffalo.edu/streaming/streaming_ctl.htm ". I have been a course director for our third year pediatric course for only about a month. My intense interest in this was enhanced by a visit to our institution by Rich and Steve in July. I first met them at dinner when we had fascinating conversation ranging from art to medical education to thoughts on the movie Fahrenheit 911. They followed by giving our department several lectures on humanism in medical education, including one using fine art. Since then I've been trying to figure out how to adapt the very abstract art that surrounds us in our institution to such an exercise. Each of them opened their lectures with references to their "stimulating", "delightful", "wonderful" dinner with the three or four of us as, such that I was convinced that we must be the most insightful and fascinating dinner partners anywhere! Now I realize, after reading all of these e-mails, that Rich and Steve had a gift for making us all feel fascinating by listening so well and hearing our passion about teaching. Even though I only spent a total of four hours with them in my life, I was hooked; after their visit, I wanted more than ever to direct the third year pediatric course, so that I could incorporate some of the ideas they talked about. In addition to appreciating us, they appreciated our institution in ways I never have. They repeatedly reminded up how lucky we were to work in such a beautiful place surrounded by art. On several occasions during those three days, they told of the "amazing" tour they had of Mayo's rare book collection, encouraging any of us that hasn't seen it to go as soon as we can make the time. I, of course, have never made the time . . . I'm taking a tour this week in their honor.

P.S. To Rich's daughter, I don't know you, but I want you to know this: He told some of us at dinner how he had such a wonderful time talking to you, his older daughter, on the way to the airport. He, of course, didn't say what you talked about, but his sharing this prompted a discussion on the "myth" of quality time with children - that you never can tell when a "good talk" will come with one of your children - you just have to be there to have it happen whenever it will. Amazing to have so many meaningful conversations with two people I just me that evening.

By: Martha DeBolt, M.D. Mayo Clinic Rochester, Minnesota

What a blessing and a privilege it was to hear and feel the life of Steve Miller today at his memorial service. We all could see and experience his wonderful gifts as a teacher/educator and leader in his COMSEP life but he was so much more.....A man of faith who was lovingly called "Mr. Kosher man" by his friends and family. Such a man of faith that his Rabbi could speak so personally and tenderly about him. "Our lives will never be the same " he said, without Steve among us. Did you know that Steve was a "short and fat" kid whose older brother so loved him that he openly wished that he could have been with him on the plane to protect him and help him. How could we not have know about his love for the Mets and the Jets!!!! His life long friends spoke of a man who valued friendship and loyalty above all else. A man who cared deeply about all his friends and brought the best out of everyone. Did you know Steve did some acting as a medical student? Certainly no surprise that he was a natural on stage. Students spoke of his deep influence on their lives. How he always found the time to teach them and listen to them and help to guide them. Friday afternoon with the students will forever be "Miller Time" whenever I meet with students. Many spoke of his love for his wife and children. Children spoke about how he was the "coolest parent" and how he preferred to be with the kids. We even learned that on nights his wife was on call all the kids got to stay up late and eat candy. His battle to balance his passion for teaching and his passion for his family came up often. We even learned of his 5% solution. It sounds like he kept everyone happy. It was clear that Steve not only touched many lives in a deep and personal way, he also changed many lives in a deep and personal way. I walked away saddened but also energized to continue the work Steve so loved. Everyone walked away and back into their lives with a similar prayer.... Lord help us to be better people in all aspects of our lives Lord help us follow the example of Steve and help us all be more open to chances to help each other in our short jury in this life. Lord help us to recommit to our patients and students to be the best we can be. May G-d have mercy on Steve and his family and may G-d help us all to continue his good works. Thank you Steve and Rich for fighting the good fight. You shall not be soon forgotten.

By: Michael Giuliano, Lenox Hill Hospital/SUNY Downstate

I will try my best to share some observations from attending Rich's memorial service--although it is hard to put into words what one can only feel from within at this particular time. While I wished there were better circumstances for me to want to travel to Buffalo, I am very glad I went. Being at the Memorial Service revealed sides of Rich we knew something about but never really realized how important those "other sides" were to him and in turn to us. It is difficult to describe the intense emotions felt by everyone who attended the memorial service for Rich. It was also wonderful to listen and hear so many wonderful Rich stories (before, during, and after the service) from his friends and family in Buffalo--and does he have friends and family!! What struck me the most about the service (that was attended by hundreds if not close to a thousand people) was that as much as we will miss Rich for his contributions that made us more humanistic doctors and better teachers, that was not the focal point of the service. Instead what everyone came to reflect and celebrate was Richard Sarkin, someone who lived his life with family and friends as his number one priority and never altered his course. The fact that he was able to do so much in his role as a local and national leader in medical education paled when it became clear what a remarkable husband, brother, son, friend, and most of all father he was and how fortunate those whom he loved were to be loved so much by him. The service was simple and yet beautiful. It opened with a close friend of the family (Jack Coyne) who was a priest and a pediatrician who opted not to wear his religious garb for his introductory remarks("because Richard would never have approved--although he was spiritual in so many other ways"). This was followed by Jess and Alex (his children) reading Rich's favorite poem by John Masefield, "I Must Go Down to the Sea Again" and then two eulogies by his brother and sister. His brother Jon, 3 years younger, spoke with so much intensity about Rich's important role as a key part of the equilateral triangle that connected him to his brother and sister and how that triangle suddenly lost its perfect shape with Rich's passing. Jon went on to say what Rich conveyed to his siblings, his mother, to other family members and most importantly to his wife and his children was an unbreakable love that no one except those in Rich's immediate family could possibly understand but he wanted everyone there to try to. His sister Jane 9 years younger, poured her heart out saying that when their father died when she was 13 and Rich was 22, Rich became the person who was "a brother and a father to me". She felt that Rich had been there whenever and wherever she needed him, and like us refused to believe he was gone. "If I believe he is gone, then I am gone" was a statement she cried out that says it all. Yet she followed that by saying she will never believe he is gone because he is now a part of her and all of us and will always be. There were two musical selections by a close friend (David Kaye) who insisted on singing rather than eulogizing and decided to do this with his teenage daughter Madeline--"because Rich would have wanted me to do it as family rather than as an individual". The music was hauntingly beautiful and yet uplifting at the same time. His best friend Frank Schreck gave the final eulogy and barely made it through. He talked about Richard as the best friend anyone could ever hope for and then told us why. He and so many others I met with after the service told so many classic Rich stories that I cannot begin to share them here but will do so when we come together and can share these stories in person. Perhaps the most important thing I will take away from his eulogy is the way he wants us to always remember to think about Rich. Rich's birthday was July 3, so every time we see or hear fireworks around the 3 and 4th of July, he wants us to look up into the sky and think about our friend. "You don't see fireworks often," he said, "but when you do they're special. As time goes by, you may not think about Rich everyday, but whenever you see fireworks, you will now think special thoughts about Richard each and every year." This was followed by a picture/slide presentation set to music of key moments captured in Rich's life. Interestingly enough, there were very few pictures of Rich in the role we see him in--teaching locally or nationally. There was only one COMSEP picture and one other of Larrie and Rich. This told me two things--one-- that people in Buffalo loved Rich not because of what he did for us as a national leader in med ed, but what he did each and every day with the people he loved in his family and community--and two, we either do not take enough pictures of each other when we see each other or his family never received any of the pictures COMSEP members might have of him. There is no better way to preserve the emotions and friendships we have shared than with a photo-op and we need to do a better job of capturing those great moments at meetings with pictures and then sharing these pictures with each other. Closing thoughts--I'm glad I went to Buffalo because I was able to put together part of who Richard Sarkin was that I would never have truly grasped despite our many discussions about the importance of balance and family. He was as balanced as anyone could ever hope or strive for, which makes his loss so painful for those he loved so much (be they local or national) and who loved him, but also gives all of us the inner peace that he was there for us whenever and wherever he could be and did not shortchange any of us during his all too short life. I also felt privileged because I was able to appreciate and value the other professional side of Richard that most of his friends in Buffalo probably never understood because of his understated modesty about what a role model, mentor, and inspiration he was to the hundreds if not thousands of us he touched at some point in our lives as he made us better teachers, pediatricians, and human beings.

By: Lewis

Last week was a roller coaster of events for me .I was eagerly anticipating meeting Rich and Steve at our hospital .They were presenting Pediatric GRAND ROUNDS on HUMANISM and PROFESSIONALISM at our hospital after the meeting at Kirksville MO . My heart missed a beat when I came to work on Wednesday and received an e mail that the grand rounds are cancelled because our speakers were on the plane which went down in Kirksville Missouri .Since then we have had tremendous amount of news on the media .But as the names of the passengers were not released I was just hoping and praying that they would have made it. I came to know finally from the e mail exchange via COMSEP members like Jan Hanson and my dept chair , unfortunately my name was dropped from the lists serve.
I had met both of them at the Vancouver meeting for the first time. Both Rich and Steve were wonderful role models and practiced whatever they preached .To Keep their spirit alive I plan to at least try to incorporate their ideas and teachings in my life .This will help me become a better person and teacher at the same time .The one I remember the most and makes me feel better when I commit to many things and feel overwhelmed is

SMALL STEPS ACHIEVE BIG FEATS.

Even though they will be dearly missed, I feel they will always be in our hearts forever.

By: Nasreen Talib, Kansas City

I know it doesn't make sense but I keep thinking that "I should have worn my boots." Steve and I both have an interest in cowboy boots and once he knew that, he would always ask me, "did you bring your boots?" I only did once. Steve was always able to remember so much about people and was always willing to explore and try new things. I will miss him and Rich very much.

By: Bill Raszka, Vermont

I was unable to attend the service for Rich in Buffalo on Saturday, but I had the privilege of being present on Sunday at B'Nai Jeshurun Synagogue in New York City for Steve's service. Other current or past COMSEP members presernt that I was aware of were Linda Tewksbury, Lyuba Konopasek, Janet Fischel, Michael Giuliano, Joe Lopreiato, Jennifer Koestler, Jan Hanson and Jane Curtis. The large, beautiful synagogue was completely full. Speakers included Steve's department chair, two medical school classmates, a medical student, Steve's brother, the rabbi's who presided and well as Steve's children and nephews and nieces. There were two very moving musical presentations. A near life-size photo blow-up of Steve in his academic regalia at a ceremony was at the front ot the synagogue. The photo perfectly captured his infectious smile and the gleam in his eye. The recurrent themes from speakers were Steve's passion for teaching and for students, his sense of humor, his creativity, his love of life, his energy, his lack of pretentiousness, his special ability to relate to children, his deep love of his family, and their love for him. Even in the presence of incredible grief, every speaker evoked laughter in relating a humorous event involving Steve, or identifying a trait of Steve that everyone recognized. It was incredible to see how many lives were touched by Steve and, of course, the same is true of Rich. Linda was wonderful to have all of us from COMSEP over to her apartment after the service for a time to share some hugs, a few more memories, and to enjoy a great deli Sandwich.
Others who attended may wish to add to my reflections on the service or share some of the specific anecdotes. To my knowledge, Lyuba is the only COMSEP member who attended both services. Perhaps she or Larrie will share some thoughts about the service for Rich in Buffalo on Saturday.
It's been wonderful to read the many tributes to Rich and Steve that have poured in. That so many of us in COMSEP, as well as individuals in APPD, APA, AAMC and other organizations, viewed them as mentors and family speaks to the uniquely engaging and endearing personal qualities that they shared. As much as we will miss them as colleagues and friends, I am still reeling with the sense of loss that their families are enduring. The loss of each of them as a husband, father, and eventually as a grandfather, as a son, a brother and an uncle is heightened when we think of how great they were or would be in each of these roles, and how much they loved their families. I know that their influence will always be a part of each family member, just as their influence on us extends far beyond their all too brief physical presence with us. I hope that we can be of some comfort to the families. As painful as it is to lose them, I take some comfort in realizing that I am a better educator and better person than if I had never known Steve or Rich, and that I can still grow professionally and personally from the example and inspiration that they provided. I am immensely grateful for the sense of family that is COMSEP. We will definitely have a time at the April COMSEP meeting to honor these two superstars of pediatric education.

By: Mike Lawless, Wake Forest University School of Medicine

Two stories, for my friends.

Richard, from another perspective: the mentor.
In the end, this is the best demonstration I have ever experienced of caring - so characteristic of this wonderful, generous, observant, giant of a man. When I took over the SIG in Med Student Education from Rich, I got lots of advice, to-do lists, etc. - in short, what I considered mentoring. Not so... because after the first session, I got real feedback, and real mentoring. Richard sent me a tough-love email, and then called me in person to make sure I was getting it - and was OK with it: he gave me a true dressing-down, and a challenge to do better, along with specific examples of what I could do to improve my performance (get there early, check out the set-up, make sure the food arrives etc.) and the experience of others (write it down, prepare the other presenters, time it out ahead etc.). I felt sick to my stomach - I had disappointed this wonderful giant of a teacher/adviser/entertainer/hero - and yet incredibly empowered to take charge and improve. That was what Richard was all about - caring so very much about each of us learners and colleagues - able to say hard/true things in a way that made it clear he was concerned for your well-being, progress, success. That of course made him an invaluable mentor, and a trusted friend...

Steve, from the beginning: a new friend.
I count Steve as my first real adult friend made outside the context of immediate work, or related to raising children. The fact that we both ended up being colleagues in COMSEP was really secondary - what ignited our friendship was sharing the heady, challenging, intellectual, intense juiciness of the very first cohort of Harvard-Macy Physician-Educators during the very cold winter of 1995. We scavenged meals at odd hours (a habit of Steve's I'm sure many of you recognize) and talked endlessly, leaping from topic to topic (a trait Leslie Fall described so aptly) with the passion and discovery of a dormitory "heart-to-heart", sharing similarities and intrigued with differences. We shopped together for presents for our children (which again evolved into a regular aspect of meeting up with Steve - I learned to arrive already armed with names/locations of the best gift sources in every town where we overlapped for meetings). But most of all, we relished the pleasure of finding some time to be alone together - sharing stories and ideas, seeking support and understanding, working through worries and vulnerabilities - with a true peer who really was always there to just listen and understand and expect nothing in return but friendship and presence and a next time...

The wonderful, enormous network of colleagues-who-have-become-friends that emanates from these two remarkable men just astounds me. No wonder we all feel so bereft at their loss. Yet the warmth and support and caring that we are all drawing on, in the many phone conversations and emails these past few desolate days, has been so very helpful and is just the beginning indication of their legacy. I hope to gather/hug/remember/eat (wouldn't Steve and Rich do all of those?) with many of you in Boston, and send hugs to all in need of one.

By: Helen

Dear Friends,
Several of us were able to attend the memorial service for Steve Miller yesterday: Mike Lawless, Mike Giuliano, Lyuba Konopasek, Linda Tewksbury, Joe Lopreiato, Jane, Mary Ann, Janet, and me (I'm sorry, I can't remember all the last names). Joe and I recorded our memories of the service on the ride home. I think Linda plans to collect recollections from the COMSEP people who were there, and then share them with the COMSEP community. For the moment, here are the notes from Joe and me. The service itself was a memorable experience--a grand tribute to Steve, simultaneously an acknowledgement of our grief and a source of comfort. I hope the notes will help you participate in the experience, too.

By: Jan Hanson

Recollections and Reflections from the Service for Steve Miller, B'nai Jeshurun, New York City, October 24, 2004 (Joe Lopreiato and Jan Hanson's journal) The Rabbi traveled to Kirksville, MO after the plane crash. When he saw the site, he said to himself, "Steve, why this place?" He answered himself, "Oh, because he was doing what he loves: teaching." A good friend: "I met Steve in the hallways last week. He said, 'I'm late for a meeting. I only have 10 minutes to spend with you." Dr. Driscoll, chair of Pediatrics at Columia: "Steve was my first hire. I always depended on him, and he never let me down." And "Unbeknownst to me, for 12 years, every Friday afternoon in a conference room right next to my office,Steve held 'Miller time' for medical students. He spent 45 minutes discussing a case, and then he would always ask the students where he should take Dodi [his wife] for dinner that weekend. All the students hoped that he would follow their recommendation." The children of the family (his children and his nieces and nephews): "We voted him the 'coolest parent.'" "Most adults when they read a book to children stop in the middle of the chapter. He didn't stop in the middle of the chapter. He read all the way to the end." Steve and his roommate from med school took a vacation together to a resort on the islands. When they arrived at the resort, the reservation read, "Mr. and Mr. Miller." Steve loved it, and he used it all week. When he called for a dinner reservation, he asked for a reservation for Mr. and Mr. Miller. A med school friend: "Dodi, he loved you so much." His older brother Barry: "Stevie, I protected you all your life. And now, I only feel guilty that I wasn't in Missouri to protect you on that plane." "You were the best brother." "I always thought it would be me and you after our parents were gone." "Steve had a passion for acting, but he followed our parents' wishes and went to medical school. He turned down Harvard Medical School, so he could go to Columbia and act while he studied medicine." One friend in medical school met him when he was painting sets for Pippin. Another met him when he was directing Fiddler on the Roof. The friend tried out for the rebel son-in-law. Steve asked him to read a line about, "Jews and Gentiles." The friend pronounced this, "Jews and Genteels." Steve asked him to read it again, and a third time, and each time he read, "Jews and Genteels." Steve let it pass without commenting. Only later did he call and explain the pronunciation on the phone. The friend got the part. Steve has three children, Jessie (11), Maya (9), and Nikko (6). He loved them so much. The Millers have been listening non-stop to the soundtrack from Wit. Dodi asked a friend to play and sing a song from the soundtrack*a song that has become Jessie's favorite. The theme of the song is, "I'm better because I knew you. I'm better because you're my friend. Because I knew you, something good has happened in me." The Rabbi: " we went on a trip to Key West. Each morning, Steve would try to decide whether to come kayaking with me. He wasn't much for water. He would debate, should I go? Should I not go? Each day for 10 days, he didn't go, and then in the evening he would regret it, and the next day he would try to decide again. Finally I asked him, 'How do you make a decision in the ER?' He said, 'Like that! [with a snap of the fingers]" At the opening of the memorial service, the rabbi cut a piece of Steve's clothing, to signify the sorrow and despair of those who have lost him. The size of the audience made us wonder, "How can one person influence so many?" We estimated over a thousand people there*probably close to 2000. Nearly every seat was filled on the huge floor of the temple, plus in 3 balconies, with 5 or 6 rows of people standing at the back and out into the halls. The Rabbi read Psalm 23 in Hebrew and English. "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want*Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." And another Psalm: "Create in me a clean heart, oh Lord, and renew a right spirit within me. Take not your Holy Spirit from me." The service was a series of psalms and prayers. The many eulogies were prayers*like prayers of thanksgiving for Steve's wonderfulness and his life. Steve's brother-in-law from the Meyer family sang a song to open the service. The Rabbis spoke the Kaddish at the end of the service. Many in the audience recited with them by heart. Steve's brother read from Ecclesiastes 12: The body returns to dust, and the spirit returns to God. Every speaker in the service hugged Dodi after sharing thoughts about Steve. She sobbed when she hugged Dr. Driscoll. She sobbed again as she left the temple at the end of the service. There was a wonderful, large picture of Steve on an easel at the front of the temple. He was dressed in academic regalia, wearing his wonderful smile. Steve(?) Monk, a close friend, shared anamattapoeia (sp?) "Steve Zane Miller. The sound of his name reflects his personality and character." Afterwards, we felt motivated to continue Steve's work in humanism and professionalism, in the ways that we can, in a sense in honor and memory of his life and work. The light-hearted stories and laughter reminded us all of Steve, with his light-hearted nature, his trademark smile and the gleam in his eye. The whole ceremony made us proud to know him. The depth, genuineness and extent of his friendships was evident throughout the room. Being in the room, we felt connect to Steve as a friend and the other friends in the room. It felt like this was repeated hundreds of times over among the many who were there. The COMSEP community was well-represented, and we felt a sense of connection and appreciation for this wonderful group.

By: Janice L. Hanson

Dear COMSEP and the community of people who loved Steve Miller and Rich Sarkin;
A tribute page to these two wonderful people is now posted on the COMSEP website http://www.comsep.org/ as a link off the home page. If you have contributed your thoughts to the COMSEP list serv, your postings are already up and displayed. It is clear from the heartfelt comments that Steve and Rich were remarkable people who touched so many people. Please consider sharing your thoughts if they also touched you. Ultimately, the comments will be downloaded and given to the families, as a small token of our affection and admiration, and as a demonstration of the heartfelt sorrow at the time of their losses.

By: Robin Deterding

A few more observations on the memorial services. I went to both over the weekend and am so deeply, achingly sad but feel fortunate that I could have heard a little more about these wonderful men that I already miss so much.

I think that one thing that struck me about eulogies for each of them was the emphatic use of the word "best" - "they were the best friends, best brothers, best sons, best uncles, best husbands, best fathers.". Rich and Steve were the best and I feel that one of the things that made them the best that they could see what was best in us, articulate it and encourage us to see it too. What better feedback . They were both so generous with time, ideas, advice, always excited to learn something new, about anything. What better qualities for teachers - their optimism and enthusiasm was contagious. They were the best.

Rich's memorial , was in a bright room in his beloved Albright Knox Art Gallery, filled with hundreds of people, with giant picture windows letting in the changing foliage, his friend and friend's daughter harmonizing to the Beatles' "In My Life" and Bob Dylan's "I Shall Be Released". I've had lots of conversations with Rich about balance - learning that he lost his father when he was 22 and became the father to his younger brother and 13 year old younger sister and hearing from his friends and family brought it all home. After the service, Marcia spoke about how she found solace sitting in Rich's office at home, how she was setting up a foundation for him, how she was hoping she could come to our next COMSEP meeting, and how much she looked forward to seeing everyone.

Steve's memorial was at his synagogue , B'nai Jeshrun, where Dodi's (Steve's wife's) father had been the rabbi. It is the synagogue my family attends too so that I can tell you it is a place that is usually filled with raucous, joyous singing and dancing, thinking and discussion, and celebration of life and God. I'd never noticed how dark it was before. One source of light was a big photograph of Steve at the front of the room, receiving an award in academic robes at Columbia's graduation - Steve looked so happy . Some more light came in from the open doors - there were so many people there that the people spilled out into the street and the doors were kept open during the service. The service began with the tradition of krya , the rending of the clothes of the mourners - I can still hear the sound of Steve's brother Barry's shirt ripping. Steve was eulogized by many wonderful people including John Driscoll, his department chair , who said that he felt that he had lost a son. One of my favorite stories (similar to one of Leslie's) was from his former roommate who spoke about them going on a trip together for which Steve had made all of the arrangements to an all inclusive, uptight resort. Evidently, when they arrived there was a plaque greeting them that said "Welcome Mr. and Mr. Miller". Steve was delighted and insisted on using "Mr and Mr Miller" for the rest of the weekend whenever he made reservations for a restaurant or for the tennis courts. Steve's brother-in-law sang a beautiful song in Hebrew and one of his good friends sang a song from the Broadway musical Wicked - Nico's (Steve's five year old son's) favorite.

Both Rich's And Steve's services ended with the mourner's kaddish, the jewish prayer for the dead.

One more thing I want to share is my last meeting with Steve on the Monday before he left for Kirksville. Although he couldn't believe that he was going to "Kirksville - where is that ? How far is that from Kansas City (their next destination)? Is it really far? Is this going to be a really long drive? Are we going to be driving for hours?" - he was so excited to be going. He spoke about how much he was looking forward to spending time with Rich and I told him that he was really lucky and I was really jealous. He told me how he was really excited that the whole DO school was being shut down for a day for their retreat. At some point, we were talking about our career goals, the conversation having taken many twists and turns, and Steve turned to look at me with one of those intense Steve looks and said " this is what I really want to be doing, this is how I want to make my contribution, this is how I can reach the most people". Our meeting continued with me sprinting after him around the Columbia campus, we hit the ER, we hit his office, we hit a few more offices, all the while debating about whether or not to get his hair cut, and him giving me some really good mentoring advice. At the time, I wondered what the hell I was doing on this marathon run with him , having run out of a meeting that wasn't even over, but decided that it was all totally worth while. I ended up with Steve, blocks away from where we started, in a part of Harlem that I didn't even recognize with Steve running to catch a cab. "Steve, how do I get back?" In what now seems metaphoric, he gave me that great Steve Miller smile, simple, clear advice and I got back without a hitch.

Sometimes I'm angry, right now I'm sad. I am so sad I won't get to chase Steve around Columbia again. I'm so sad that I won't get to have any of those great conversations with Steve that Leslie described so well. I am so sad that Rich and I can't continue our very slow reading and email discussion of John Berger's "Ways of Seeing" with his brother Jon. Steve, we have two workshops to do this week. Rich, I need you give that "Arrows from a Quiver" workshop for my Doctoring course faculty in the Spring. I miss you guys so badly but I feel so lucky to have been able to know you for this altogether too short a time. Thank you for inspiring me to see the best in everyone and trying to achieve the best myself.

By: Lyuba Konopasek, New York

I can't yet truly take it in. And I can't imagine a COMSEP meeting without Rich and Steve. I first met both of them at the meeting in Nashville, and I knew that these were two remarkable men who made me want to be a better educator than I will ever be--but I'll keep trying. They brought their Humanism in Medicine workshop here to Akron last year, and it was such a privilege to learn from them in more depth some of the ways they kept their lives balanced. Reading the postings from others keeps opening up another layer of sadness for me. I grieve for their wives and children, their siblings and friends. To their families: I hope there will some day be a small comfort in realizing that Rich and Steve have left a rich legacy. Thank you so much for sharing them with us.

By: Starla Glick Martinez, Akron Children's Hospital

A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.
A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names..
A real friend has their address in his address book.
A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.
A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.
A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.
A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail you with it.
A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.
A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend calls you after you had a fight.
A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!
A simple friend reads this e-mail and deletes it.
A real friend passes it on and sends it back to you!
Pass this on to anyone you care about......if you get it back you have no beginning, no end. It keeps us together, like our Circle of friends.
Today I pass the friendship ball to you. Pass it on to someone who is a friend to you.....

By: Karen Marcdante

Rich Sarkin was a fellow colleague here in the Department of Pediatrics in Buffalo. Our faculty, residents, medical students, and our University community are stunned and grieving deeply. In particular, it has been very tough on our current residents who first went to medical school at University at Buffalo, and then went on to stay here for their Pediatrics residency. It has been so gratifying to read these comments from Rich's colleagues in COMSEP. It has given me a greater appreciation for his broader reach and impact, as well as his clear capacity for companionship, compassion and caring to those of you who are the future of pediatric medical education. I appreciate all of you who took the time to write and share.

By: Rita M. Ryan, MD, Chief, Division of Neonatology, State University of New York at Buffalo, Women & Children's Hospital of Buffalo, 219 Bryant Street, Buffalo, NY 14222

The many shared anecdotes and tributes have provided comfort to all of us--just what you'd expect from this family called COMSEP. I have no eloquence, but just a quote I came across, from Charles Dickens:

And can it be that in a world so full and busy,
the loss of one creature makes a void in any heart,
so wide and deep that nothing
but the width and depth of eternity can fill it up.

By: Pat Joyce, UConn

Have not attended COMSEP meetings for some years since I am no longer the Clerkship Director. Nevertheless, I always regret not doing so. Though others might not understand, all of you know why. COMSEP is about people trying to ensure that the next generation of physicians will be better than we are. Steve and Rich were passionate about this cause; exhorting us to be better role models and teachers. We drew energy and enthsiasm from them. I'm sure we are all resolving to continue their work and will do so with renewed energy - knowing that continuing their work is the best way we can honor them.

By: Mary Bozynski MD, University of Michigan

I never had the privilege of knowing them personally. Like all of us in the pediatric academic community, I listened to them and learned from them, and I was aware of and greatly appreciated their many and continuing contributions to not only our educational mission but also the further evolution of pediatrics and child health and well being. Their loss is immeasurable.

By: Bonita Stanton, MD, Schotanus Professor and Chair, Carman and Ann Adams Department of Pediatrics, Wayne State University, Children's Hospital of Michigan

The outpouring of affection, admiration, adoration, love and heartfelt loss for Steve and Rich is a magnificent tribute to the giants these two men were (I did not know Rich at all, but giant he clearly was). thank you to whoever created this tribute page as it is both an honor to read about their accomplishments in their professional lives and a source of therapy for the professional and personal communities through which they walked so gracefully every day of their lives. in particular, it is helpful to me in trying, so far unsuccessfully, to cope with the loss of a friend who i always knew was a very special guy, a wonderful husband and an amazing dad.
All of the tributes online, eulogies on sunday, discussions with friends/family/colleagues reveal a true role model for all men; a man who was as consistent with and devoted to his colleagues, students and patients as he was to his family and friends; a man who pre-judged no-one; a man who sought to understand each individual from where that individual stood, not based on some artificial criteria or requisite personal characteristics; ok, except that he had no stomach for the yankees and, like many of us, was a perenially frustrated mets/jets fan; indeed, i have mentioned elsewhere that it is a small, perhaps silly irony that amongst the last things we spoke about was getting together with our kids to watch a red sox/yankees game during the alcs; steve was not so sure he could stomach watching the yankees move on to another world series, but he was to call when he returned from his trip; and lo and behold, the yankees fell in a miraculous collapse and, now, with steve sitting in the front row for all four games...beer in hand, the sox are the world champs; but i digress...
Rabbi abraham joshua heschel, who i believe was a teacher of dodi's dear father, marshall meyer, said of human beings: "Our ability to lend form to our being depends upon our understanding of the singularity of human living". steve took that understanding and made it an artform. and, as i have learned, he worked tirelessly, sharing his humanity with his students and colleagues across the nation, surely passing on healthy doses of it all along the way. it is at times like these that usually hectic days with hardly enough time in them often seem to slow down to a near pause...during the pause of this last week, through all the sadness, grief and soul-searching, i feel like i have been able to see things even more clearly through his vision. if we can all bring to the plate in our personal and professional lives what steve brought with him every day, perhaps no bigger tribute could be offered to a giant who was an otherwise unassuming, laid-back, affable, warm and loving man.

By: Alan Gardner

Lewis captured the spirit and content of the service very well. Barbi and I were priviledged to be there and to share our grief and happiness that we had been Rich's friends with Lewis, Larrie and Joyce Greenberg and the wide range of Rich's and Marsha's friend who were also there. The service found a way to express the joy of Rich's life as well as the sadness of his premature departure. The comments by Frank Schreck, MD, Rich's best friend and Alex and Jessica's pediatrician, that suggested we think of Rich whenever we observe fireworks were wonderful.

I have thought about some additional information that might be of interest to Rich's friends. At the service, one became aware of the remarkable family that Rich led after his father's death. His brother, Jon, is an accomplished artist, with an amazing life story that has been written about in the New Yorker, his sister is an executive editor for Vanity Fair, his aunt is an actress on the Sopranos and has been in many movies and his mother, wife and children were remarkably brave in facing the events of that day and the future.

Rich, Marsha and we shared many happy memories over the past 15 years and his loss is very personal to us. Rich was remarkable in our very political academic world to have a mission, passion and commitment to improving teaching and to his family, and he refused to get bogged down or to expend energy in what was not important. In particular, I never heard him speak negatively about anyone. Every minute with them was fun and positive. As one of our mutual friends wrote me this week, his absence is felt as much as his presence.

I also knew Steve professionally and have spoken with the two of them at a symposium on humanism. Steve was also a wonderful, gentle, and inspirational man whose light won't be extinguished by the conflagration of a plane crash.

My deep sympathies to all of their many friends and colleagues. Sincerely.

By: Bruder

Rich Sarkin was a fellow colleague here in the Department of Pediatrics in Buffalo. Our faculty, residents, medical students, and our University community are stunned and grieving deeply. In particular, it has been very tough on our current residents who first went to medical school at University at Buffalo, and then went on to stay here for their Pediatrics residency. It has been so gratifying to read these comments from RichÕs colleagues in COMSEP. It has given me a greater appreciation for his broader reach and impact, as well as his clear capacity for companionship, compassion and caring to those of you who are the future of pediatric medical education. I appreciate all of you who took the time to write and share.

By: Rita M. Ryan, MD Chief, Division of Neonatology State University of New York at Buffalo Women & Children's Hospital of Buffalo 219 Bryant Street Buffalo, NY 14222

Though I am not so eloquent as the many who have shared their thoughts and stories, I share the loss. A quote attributed to Charles Dickens touched me:

And can it be
That in a world so full and busy,
The loss of one creature
Makes a void in any heart,
So wide and deep that nothing
But the width and depth of eternity
Can fill it up!

The void they've left is, for all of us in COMSEP, both personal and professional. And we will need to fill it up, personally and professionally, with each other. I can already hear them telling us to get to work!

By: Pat Joyce, UConn

I have not attended COMSEP meetings for some years since I am no longer the Clerkship Director. Nevertheless, I always regret not doing so. Though others might not understand, all of you know why. COMSEP is about people trying to ensure that the next generation of physicians will be better than we are. Steve and Rich were passionate about this cause; exhorting us to be better role models and teachers. We drew energy and enthusiasm from them. I'm sure we are all resolving to continue their work and will do so with renewed energy - knowing that continuing their work is the best way we can honor them.

By: Mary Bozynski MD University of Michigan

I never had the privilege of knowing them personally. Like all of us in the pediatric academic community, I listened to them and learned from them, and I was aware of and greatly appreciated their many and continuing contributions to not only our educational mission but also the further evolution of pediatrics and child health and well being. Their loss is immeasurable.

By: Bonita Stanton, MD Schotanus Professor and Chair Carman and Ann Adams Department of Pediatrics Wayne State University Children's Hospital of Michigan

Now that I have let Rich and Steve's passing sink in and have reflected a long time, I have these thoughts to share.

Although I have known Steve a long time and learned a significant amount from him, Rich has had a profound influence on how I practice medicine and teach students/residents/faculty. I first met Rich in July as an intern in Buffalo many many years ago rotating in the pediatric emergency room. He practiced the "One minute preceptor" before its conception and birth. I had seen a child with some medical illness, gathered the data, and presented it to him. I then waited for the next step. Rich being over a foot taller than me, looked down on me and started barraging me with questions, and goading me to "make a commitment". He didn't care if it was the right or wrong answer, he just wanted me to say something. Finally, I got so fed up with listening to him I said something, made a commitment and a diagnosis, and we were buds from then on. Little did I know at that time that he would become one of the leading pediatric educators of my time, or that I would learn so much from him that surpassed learning how to take care of "snotty nosed children" and examining well babies. Rich brought that need to make a commitment beyond making diagnoses, and to doing things, doing them for the right reasons and in the best way possible. Now as an "adult" and an educator, I have had the privilege to attend many of his faculty development sessions and even implement many of his teaching techniques. He was an innovator, a motivator, a resource, a colleague and I hope a friend. I will think of him as I plan resident/student teaching sessions, workshops and faculty development sessions.

My heart goes out to both families, especially to wives and children of whom both Rich and Steve spoke so highly about. Few people have had as much effect on others as did these individuals and done so unselfishly and with such joy.

By: Mimi Bar-on, Loyola University

Dear COMSEP Community,
I would like to express my thoughts regarding the recent loss of Drs. Miller and Sarkin. I am not an educator or a physician, but I am someone who has been touched by the work and presence of Drs. Miller and Sarkin at the COMSEP annual meetings. I have only had the privilege to work with the COMSEP group for three years, but I, too, feel the sadness, pain and loss of these wonderful men. The bond this group shares is even spread to an average person like me. As their roles of leaders, they both always made me feel like a part of the COMSEP family as the meeting planner. The memories I have of the 2004 meeting, dance, and hugs keep me smiling. Dr. Miller turned that Saturday night dinner that was supposed to be on the "beach" into a great party after all. I am truly grateful to Jean for extending the opportunity to me to plan your annual meetings three years ago. I never imagined the wonderful people I would meet and how rewarding it would be to me to work with such a group of admired people. I know that the 2005 and 2006 meetings were really important to Dr. Miller - he expressed this to me often as the meeting planner. I am so, so honored and thankful to have known Drs. Miller and Sarkin, and I am really excited about continuing to work with all of you in the future at the meetings, and hopefully the meetings will just blossom and grow because of the legacy of Drs. Sarkin and Miller. Thank you for allowing me to share.

By: Lisa Elliott, Meeting Planner for COMSEP

Steve's 5% solution was mentioned by one of his best friends. He told a story of running with Steve one day in the park. They were discussing how to balance work and family and they came up with the idea of shifting "just" 5% of their work time into family and friend time. After that day they would always be asking each other, "Did you find that 5% yet?" He didn't answer the question but it was obvious to all that Steve found many 5% solutions for many of people, including his friends and family. Rich and Steve just keep teaching us all, in life and in death.

By: Michael Giuliano

I am Barry Miller, Steve's brother. I just want to thank all of you for loving and respecting my brother. I know that along with his passion for teaching and his family this made him extremely happy. I am very proud of him and I am grateful that I could share him with all of you. He will always be with us in our times of need and our times of happiness.Your words are also a great comfort for me and my parents. Love.

By: Barry Miller (Steve's brother)

I can't say I knew Rich or Steve well at all. I've read all of these postings and tributes eagerly - grinning at shared memories and descriptions of great giants and sparkling eyes. As I think about it, I don't believe I've ever been to an academic conference where I didn't end up in a workshop or meeting led by at least one of these guys. They cared about - and taught about - the important things in life and medicine. As I've paid closer attention these past couple of weeks, there are many many things about my work and teaching that have been touched by encounters with Rich or Steve.

In moments when I imagine future meetings, or clerkship orientations, or COMSEP-inspired curriculum changes...I stop short, thinking, "this can't have happened." They must be off somewhere leading a workshop together ...sparkling, laughing, inspiring.

By: Elizabeth Stuart

I have not yet had the courage to send a comment -- largely because I didn't' think that I could ever write such eloquent memories as those already submitted. But today after reading Lyuba's beautiful remembrance on the COMSEP listserv I have decided to try.

On Wednesday October 20 my secretary buzzed me to say that "Dr. Konopasek from New York is on the line" (I had dutifully ignored the telephone ringing so that I could finish a project…). Lyuba told me the terrible news about Steve and Rich, which prompted immediate grief. But the full impact of this loss has taken a long time to sink in. In some ways being too busy with education and patient care activities has kept the reality out of the forefront of my mind. I have even started to exercise more. But each day that passes and each message that appears on the list has made the loss more real and more difficult to accept. I still need more faculty development, Rich! Without your continued urgings, Steve, I might fall into a lackadaisical approach to my teaching.

I wish that attendance at the funeral ceremonies for Steve and Rich had been a possibility for me, because these ceremonies might have helped make the loss truly real. I still have a bit of the same feeling that I did when I was 10 and my brother died. For a long time I could not believe that it had really happened -- surely he would be there tomorrow when I woke up. He wasn't and they won't be. But their work and our memories of them will remain. We will all continue to carry on with the education of our students and residents and the care of our patients. We will all rededicate ourselves to emulate Steve and Rich as role models, examples of humanistic physicians, and just plain good people.

If you will be at the AAMC meeting, look me up. Come to the Gold Foundation lecture at 5 pm on Saturday 11/6 at the Westin Copley Place Hotel. There will be a brief remembrance of Steve and Rich at this session.

By: Jerold C. Woodhead, MD Sahai Family Associate Professor of Medical Education Associate Professor of Pediatrics

My colleague and your COMSEP colleague Pat Joyce, wrote to me today to tell me how much she appreciated my note to our UConn colleagues about Rich and Steve. As most of my department colleagues didn't know either of them, I really felt that it was important that they all know something about how how profound the loss has been. Thus, I'm sharing this with you today.

I'm writing to all of my departmental colleagues-several of whom who were fortunate to have known Steve or Rich and the majority of whom did not- to share a few words about these men who in the course of the past decade became two treasured colleagues, collaborators and mentors and dear friends. To hear that either one of these gentle giants had died would have brought indescribable pain to literally not hundreds, but thousands of individuals. To hear the reality, that both of them died while together, is unimaginable. During the past five days there has been an amazing outpouring of similar messages from Rich and Steve's friends and colleagues across North America on the COMSEP and APA list serves. There were so many special qualities Rich and Steve had. But two of these are important reasons why so many individuals beyond the families and local friends and colleagues are grieving. Rich and Steve each had the ability to make each one of us feel as if we were their special friends as well as the ability to make us feel as if what we brought to the table was incredibly valuable.

Steve Miller was the current president o